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A Bridge Metaphor

 Ideally, a relationship lets the people in it have and achieve more than a single person can. How well this works depends on both partners holding up their ends of their agreements.


A bridge is a good metaphor for a relationship, since it is literally a physical version of one. Strong bridges, like strong relationships, have much in common. 


The simplest kind of bridge is a plank over a creek. It has two support anchors on either end with a bridge in between.


If the plank is too weak for what it needs to bear, it will break.

If either support the plank sits on is too weak, the whole thing will fail.


In this metaphor, the bridge anchors are the people involved. The plank is the relationship between them. 


The durability of the relationship is dependent on the strength of the relationship between the people who “anchor” it.


Each person in the relationship has to hold up their part of it.


 If a partner's commitment to their agreements weakens over time, the relationship can eventually collapse.


Commitment to the relationship is demonstrated by making and keeping good agreements. 


A good agreement is one that is not too loose, or too rigid. If agreements are too loose, they can be hard to trust. If they are too rigid, they can break down under pressure. 


There is no “perfect” kind of agreement, except for the kind that is “just right” for the people involved. 


As time marches on and circumstances change, so too must the agreements. Being able to adapt and communicate one’s own needs is a requirement for longevity.


The medicine finds you where you are.

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